[now it's his turn to think about pushing Kanda off???? but instead he HUFFS and pointedly looks past Kanda at the window, at this sun that has been rising for a while damn.
[ALSO STOP FERRIS WHEELS ARE SLOW THEY'RE HERE FOR AT LEAST TWENTY MINUTES though they're probably being lowered down by now.
The thing is--there's a lot about people that Kanda doesn't see. Mostly, it's because he doesn't look. The vast majority of the time, there are other things on his mind: his missions, the war, the countless horrific memories he has to work on shutting out every single day. In part, it's because of inexperience. He'd talked to Edgar and Tui in the lab, sure, but even after nine years out in the world, there's still so much he doesn't know.
But more than anything, it's because of his own heart. Anything less than such endless, binding, obsessive love, the kind of thing that would drag a person back from death itself, the soul-deep longing that pushed him forward, that broke through when none of his other memories did--if it isn't that, then it's not worth his attention. Not when he has other priorities.
This... isn't that. At least, he doesn't think so. It can't be, not when Lavi disappeared before Kanda found resolution. Not when they're both bound to duties greater than themselves.
But Kanda isn't totally oblivious to everything. He's not so stupid that he doesn't realize this is something. He just--doesn't know what, or what to do with it.]
[STOP THEY CAN'T BE LOWERED DOWN YET THEY HAVE TO AT LEAST REACH THE TIPPY TOP
At that, Lavi shoots Kanda another look, searching his expression for the usual confusion or disinterest or annoyance, and finds none. Instead, the absence of all three makes his chest feel a little funny, and he tucks his chin on his hand, pressing the fingers over his mouth to not quite successfully hide a stupid grin --]
I said it first.
[pointedly. even though that's not right, kanda has definitely called him stupid first since they've been here? but Lavi says it anyway, because he wants to be a little childish in this moment, and feels safe enough to be. He leans over, knocking his elbow into Kanda's side and gesturing with his chin at the view again.]
Anyway, quit looking at me. We're almost at the top!
[it's a picture perfect moment as the timing falls neatly into place, and the sun rises brightly as if in answer]
[YOU SAID IT WAS TOO SLOW THIS IS A TURBO FERRIS WHEEL NOW!!!!]
You did not.
[Tch!!! He's usually not childishly pedantic, but SOME PEOPLE have a way of bringing out his immaturity... wonder why.
It's very briefly tempting to not look, but that's more Allen's brand of spite than his, so he elbows Lavi back--less gently, of course--and turns back to the window. He keeps his gaze fixed low, down on the horizon to combat any stray, complicated feelings about the broad open sky. Kanda would still prefer this view from a mountain or something, he thinks, but... it is nice, and he can pretend, just for a minute or two, that they're on a normal mission, not stuck in this hateful town.]
Kanda's CHILDISH reply almost makes Lavi laugh, but he saves himself by turning it into a big stupid grin instead, choosing instead to respond with silence so as not to RUIN this moment with his annoying ass voice -- it's really just a sunrise like any other, how many times has he seen them while traveling with Gramps, and then while on missions at the Order?
It's different this time.
Because he'd gotten out of bed for this, because he'd dragged Kanda all the way to sketchy carnival in a sketchier town. It's a sunrise with purpose, framed in peace.
His hand is still on his face, which he uses to cover his mouth again, trying to silence the instinctive yawn. He feels content and warm.... which means he feels.... sneepy.... He shifts to the side, leaning his weight on Kanda,]
No just kidding. Ordinarily, he probably would move away--he lets Lavi into his space more often than most would think he'd allow, but he still prefers to guard his bubble.
But Lavi let him do this weeks ago, and... it really is so rare for them to find moments of peace. To feel safe enough to let their guards down, especially in the middle of somewhere dangerous like this.
Kanda doesn't know they have barely over a day left together--if he did, maybe even he would make better use of their time. But even so, he's quiet, and he lets Lavi lean on him without complaint.]
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You were being weird! You're still all red!
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Okay, fine -- I was laying about the heat. It's cause I'm embarrassed!!
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Because you were staring. [Now he's just being a butthead on purpose]
LAYING ABOUT THE HEAT??????????
Because I said I like looking at you, stupid.]
IT'S FINE IT'S FINE
The thing is--there's a lot about people that Kanda doesn't see. Mostly, it's because he doesn't look. The vast majority of the time, there are other things on his mind: his missions, the war, the countless horrific memories he has to work on shutting out every single day. In part, it's because of inexperience. He'd talked to Edgar and Tui in the lab, sure, but even after nine years out in the world, there's still so much he doesn't know.
But more than anything, it's because of his own heart. Anything less than such endless, binding, obsessive love, the kind of thing that would drag a person back from death itself, the soul-deep longing that pushed him forward, that broke through when none of his other memories did--if it isn't that, then it's not worth his attention. Not when he has other priorities.
This... isn't that. At least, he doesn't think so. It can't be, not when Lavi disappeared before Kanda found resolution. Not when they're both bound to duties greater than themselves.
But Kanda isn't totally oblivious to everything. He's not so stupid that he doesn't realize this is something. He just--doesn't know what, or what to do with it.]
...Idiot.
[Absolutely useless response thank you Kanda]
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At that, Lavi shoots Kanda another look, searching his expression for the usual confusion or disinterest or annoyance, and finds none. Instead, the absence of all three makes his chest feel a little funny, and he tucks his chin on his hand, pressing the fingers over his mouth to not quite successfully hide a stupid grin --]
I said it first.
[pointedly. even though that's not right, kanda has definitely called him stupid first since they've been here? but Lavi says it anyway, because he wants to be a little childish in this moment, and feels safe enough to be. He leans over, knocking his elbow into Kanda's side and gesturing with his chin at the view again.]
Anyway, quit looking at me. We're almost at the top!
[it's a picture perfect moment as the timing falls neatly into place, and the sun rises brightly as if in answer]
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You did not.
[Tch!!! He's usually not childishly pedantic, but SOME PEOPLE have a way of bringing out his immaturity... wonder why.
It's very briefly tempting to not look, but that's more Allen's brand of spite than his, so he elbows Lavi back--less gently, of course--and turns back to the window. He keeps his gaze fixed low, down on the horizon to combat any stray, complicated feelings about the broad open sky. Kanda would still prefer this view from a mountain or something, he thinks, but... it is nice, and he can pretend, just for a minute or two, that they're on a normal mission, not stuck in this hateful town.]
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Kanda's CHILDISH reply almost makes Lavi laugh, but he saves himself by turning it into a big stupid grin instead, choosing instead to respond with silence so as not to RUIN this moment with his annoying ass voice -- it's really just a sunrise like any other, how many times has he seen them while traveling with Gramps, and then while on missions at the Order?
It's different this time.
Because he'd gotten out of bed for this, because he'd dragged Kanda all the way to sketchy carnival in a sketchier town. It's a sunrise with purpose, framed in peace.
His hand is still on his face, which he uses to cover his mouth again, trying to silence the instinctive yawn. He feels content and warm.... which means he feels.... sneepy.... He shifts to the side, leaning his weight on Kanda,]
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No just kidding. Ordinarily, he probably would move away--he lets Lavi into his space more often than most would think he'd allow, but he still prefers to guard his bubble.
But Lavi let him do this weeks ago, and... it really is so rare for them to find moments of peace. To feel safe enough to let their guards down, especially in the middle of somewhere dangerous like this.
Kanda doesn't know they have barely over a day left together--if he did, maybe even he would make better use of their time. But even so, he's quiet, and he lets Lavi lean on him without complaint.]