yuu!! yuu!!! yuu!!!!!!

[bookpapers]

Comments

Week 6, Wednesday

[sixillusions]

[BEATS YOU UP would Lavi follow him when he leaves the party or are they finding each other later idk IT'S UP TO YOU. He is here for a while!! But he is ghostly and mostly intangible like everyone else. He's also still missing his ear, though his hair is down, so it's harder to see right now.

HEWWO FOOL]

[bookpapers]

[DON'T JUST SAY HEWWO FOOL and yeah Lavi would have followed him... BINCH!!! STAY AND ENDURE OMEGAVERSE!!!!

he has so many emotions right now rattling around in both his head and his HEART that it takes a moment for him to say anything -- he just looks at Kanda, the ghostly apparition, and notes every difference he can see. the hair is hiding it, but he KNOWS that Kanda is still missing his ear thanks to everyone else who has written about Kanda!!!!

He can't tell if Kanda just put his hair down because it's annoying to wear it up while also wearing a cat kigu hood or if this is a new hairstyle change to accompany all the other changes to Kanda that Lavi doesn't know about --]

Did you get my gift? I sent it with my letter.

[sixillusions]

[Yes... Kanda... famous for how often he changes things up...

ALSO STOP NOT OMEGAVERSE TCH but it's fine they don't have to go far. Once they're away from the crowd he doesn't actually care where they go.]

I--

[BLIPS OUT OF EXISTENCE

Flickers back after a bit]

So--

[...

Sighs]

Not even that, huh.

[bookpapers]

[STOP LISTEN

luckily he has seen so many of u dead fcks blip during the party that he can guess why it's happening now!!!]

Guess that means you gotta write me back.

[yay! censored letters from kanda!!!]

[sixillusions]

[Gives him a flat look]

[bookpapers]

[NARROWS HIS SINGLE EYE BACK]

I mean it, Yuu...

[sixillusions]

Don't look at me like that. I can't say shit.

[NOT EVEN ABOUT ANSWERING LETTERS although he's pretty sure Lavi knows what his answer would be anyway.]

[bookpapers]

[he makes another FACE at this but it's for their GAG ORDER damn,]

...S'fine, we'll figure it out one way or another. We know that we gotta cut down our numbers, and we've been sharing the scripture. Anything more's gonna come after the weekend.

[sixillusions]

Mm.

[........

Experimentally tries to punch him in the side

It connects for a second

heh]

[bookpapers]

[HELLO?

he expected the punch but not for it to make CONTACT?? he immediately grabs his side]

Oh c'mon -- I should be punching you!

[sixillusions]

[It's a very cold touch and it only lasts for a second... but Kanda looks satisfied, like a jerk]

You deserve it.

[RUDE]

[bookpapers]

[it's like being jabbed by an ice cream cone...

he can't even say anything to this because it's true, damn.]

...Yeah, I know. I couldn't figure it out, even though the answer was right there in front of me.

[sixillusions]

[STARES AT HIM LIKE THIS IS THE DUMBEST THING HE'S EVER HEARD]

[bookpapers]

[DON'T LOOK AT HIM LIKE THAT!!!! HE DOESN'T KNOW HOW TO DECIPHER THIS LOOK!!!!!

he looks away.....]

[sixillusions]

I should hit you again. [TCH] Not for that, dumbass.

[bookpapers]

[looks over at him... tentatively.... which is very out of character for "lavi" but listen,]

Then what?

[sixillusions]

For getting your stupid ass kicked over and over!

[Not that he CARES about your WELL-BEING or anything tch]

[bookpapers]

[normally, he'd take this moment to hang off Kanda's incorporeal arm and look at him with his shiny eye, gooey with gratitude, maybe rub it in even more that Kanda cares about him -- (but he'd already known that)

instead, he looks away again, feeling a pang.]

I kept getting back up.

[even though it was hard and he felt the Urge To Give Up, even though that was supposed to be Kanda's job --]

And s'not like it's the first time I've had my ass kicked.

[sixillusions]

I know that.

[He knows Lavi is stronger than he leads most people to believe--that he's resilient, both in battle and in spirit, in ways that Kanda's always been able to recognize, even if he's never said it to Lavi himself. But hadn't he said it to others? Wasn't he the one telling them not to worry, that Lavi would be fine?

...But still. It's different here. When they don't have access to their true strength, when they have no clue what the monsters around them are capable of.

(When he's too far away to do anything about it, and yelling through paper isn't enough.)]

[bookpapers]

[The answer makes him feel prickly, caught between giving the same answer again and snapping back. He thought he'd gotten all his anger out on that piece of paper, or at least he tried to convince himself he had -- just long enough to answer every question with a carefully constructed lie: 'I'm fine. I'm here. I'm still going. Yuu's dead and I'm not, and that's okay.'

Like it ever was okay. Like it's okay now.

He grits his teeth,]

Why didn't you heal your ear?

[sixillusions]

[Looks at him sidelong. Considers what to say for a minute. He's so limited in what he can talk about, but... it doesn't really matter for this, does it?]

...You know why.

[Lavi's smart; surely he must understand why Kanda would prefer to leave his body alone for a while, regardless of what they may or may not have at their disposal.]

[bookpapers]

[He does know why, even though the answer doesn't satisfy him in the least -- even though there's nothing he can say in response. He just remembers that night again and feels the same wave of grief and exhaustion, feels caught between wanting Kanda to be safe and whole and just wanting him to be --]

...Is it really safer over there?

[sixillusions]

[...

He reaches over again, butting the heel of his palm against the side of Lavi's head. This one doesn't connect, but at least(?) he'll get to feel a chill.

More quietly:]

Talk about something else.

[They're not here for long. He doesn't want to waste time blipping in and out of existence over questions he can't answer.]

[bookpapers]

[It's a familiar chill -- he's tried touching the others, only to feel cold in return.But this time it zings through him, all the way through, leaving him cold and bereft, too much like the time he had to run his hands over Kanda, body part after part.

Everything he wants to ask and desperately know about is how Kanda is doing and what he's been doing, anything to override the last image he'll never forget in his head. But he curbs the desire, because they don't have enough time.

And there are things he needs to say that he wouldn't leave in a letter, not after knowing how public they are.]

...I partnered up the weekend you died.

[he's not sure if kanda knows, if the same restriction exists over there that would prevent him from learning.

and maybe he's afraid to learn that kanda does know actually,]

I haven't made my wish yet.

[sixillusions]

[It's not terribly rare for Kanda to look surprised, but it's unusual enough that this reaction makes it obvious he hadn't known.

He doesn't answer right away, swallowing back his first responses, the ones that would surely have him vanishing again.]

...Why?

[He thinks he can guess, but--he needs to hear it. Lavi needs to say it.

Sure, the risk is probably lower now--so many casualties likely means a number of people without partners. And Lavi is well loved, here. Kanda doesn't need to pay attention to all the romance shenanigans to see that. If something happens, the others will look out for him.

...Still. The thought of Lavi's soul being tied to another person, on top of his monster? He doesn't like it. Despite everything, it's not what he wanted to hear.]